Monday, January 26, 2009

Nancy Pelosi: No More Babies !!!

This post rated PG 13 for some sensitive material

Chairman Nan Says "Stop Making Babies.!!"

Nancy Pelosi has some advice for America. No babies !! According to Chairman Nan, in our current economic crisis, Americans should refrain from having children until times get better. Drudge Report reported on her remarks as follows.

"Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi boldly defended a move to add birth control funding to the new economic "stimulus" package, claiming "contraception will reduce costs to the states and to the federal government." Pelosi, the mother of 5 children and 6 grandchildren, who once said, "Nothing in my life will ever, ever compare to being a mom," seemed to imply babies are somehow a burden on the treasury.
"The revelation came during an exchange Sunday morning on ABC's THIS WEEK. STEPHANOPOULOS: Hundreds of millions of dollars to expand family planning services. How is that stimulus? PELOSI: Well, the family planning services reduce cost. They reduce cost. The states are in terrible fiscal budget crises now and part of what we do for children's health, education and some of those elements are to help the states meet their financial needs. One of those - one of the initiatives you mentioned, the contraception, will reduce costs to the states and to the federal government. STEPHANOPOULOS: So no apologies for that? PELOSI: No apologies. No. we have to deal with the consequences of the downturn in our economy. "

It is advice like this that got our Social Security system into the pickle it's in. Like everything else, we are outsourcing population replacement to developing countries. Instead of having children who pay into the system when they get older, we just import ready made adults who only need language classes instead of a twelve year education. It's the best thing since cheap electronics and toys from China. Outsource childbirth !!! No more American babies !!! The labour costs are too high. ( No pun intended.)

Does anyone remember WIN buttons? Gerald Ford came out with them during his brief term as President .

He called a press conference on October 8,1974 to declare inflation to be public enemy number one. He urged the public to wear WIN buttons which stood for "Whip Inflation Now!!" The campaign met with immediate ridicule. Some wore the buttons up side down and said it stood for "Need Immediate money." The campaign did nothing to establish Gerald Ford as a towering intellect. After Lyndon Johnson was quoted as saying that Ford could not walk and chew gum at the same time, a risque riddle started making the rounds.
"How does Gerald Ford practice birth control?"
"He chews gum in bed."

In that light hearted spirit, I think Nancy Pelosi could offer a line of merchandise to encourage population control. Bedsheets with her picture and large portraits of Nancy Pelosi to be hung in master bedrooms all across America could galvanise the public as never before to heed her call.

We will of course be dealing with economic fallout from a drop in the birth rate. There are whole industries around the needs of children. From toys and children's furniture to amusement parks, children stimulate the economy. Education and pediatric medicine are also fields that would be affected by a reduction in the birth rate. Then of course America would experience the problems faced by Europe , which has a shrinking and aging population.

When the economic repercussions of Nancy Pelosi's foolish advice are fully felt, there will be a belated campaign to raise the national birth rate. Posters, neckties, coffee mugs will all be a part of a national campaign to rejuvenate America. President Ford's WIN buttons will enjoy a raging comeback. But instead of "Whip Inflation Now" they will stand for "Whip Infertility Now."

Outraged Democrats will scoff at the campaign to increase the birth rate. Cynics, led by Nancy Pelosi will wear the buttons up side down just as they were worn during the Ford administration in the 1970's to read "NIM". But instead of standing for "No Immediate Miracles" or "Need Immediate Money" they will stand for "Nancy Impugns Motherhood" or "National Infertility Movement".

Obama's supporters have made him out to be a great force for change, a powerful engine pulling the train of history forward. Nancy Pelosi !!! The train is boarding now. Please board immediately! And take your seat next to Gerald Ford. Sphere: Related Content

1 comment:

Teena in Toronto said...

Strong advice.

Happy blogoversary!